Category: Books

This Only Happens to Me, Part 2

I am so mad at myself. And this happened to me because of me, which is the most frustrating part. I can’t even blame anyone else!

The one thing I feared happening, happened. I lost my damn phone. It was a beautiful, holographic Samsung Note 10 with a cute case and glittery Pop Socket. All my photos!! My eBooks!! My memes!!

I’m most devastated about my photos. And my darn memory card. I have never lost a phone in my life. And all because I went somewhere when I should have stayed home. I even had a FEELING I should stay home. Why don’t I ever listen to instincts??

It all started Monday, Labor Day. I slept in a little and was going to spend the day cleaning and watching Season 3 of 90 Day Fiancé: Where Are They Now? But first, I made French toast for the kiddos.

I started laundry and ate 2 pieces of French toast. Yes, I had carbs–you would have, too. These slices of bread had BERRIES in them. Then I get a message from Mel around 1pm asking if I wanted to meet her and her friend Edith at Yardhouse. I was feeling incredibly lazy, comfy and I hadn’t even showered, but she said we could meet at 3pm. I got ready in a hurry and met her at her house and we took off together to Yardhouse.

We had a good time catching up and gossiping and talking about our lives and our plans. Then we got to talking with Edith when she arrived. We had drinks, and shots and more drinks. Then we ended up at the beach on a Monday evening when I have work the next day [insert facepalm emoji here]. It was around this time that I thought, Shit. I should have stayed home.

We laughed, we drank some more, we had fun, I somehow fell and scraped my knee with sand and then we head home around 1am. (Neither of us were driving, by the way.) I hear my phone so I answer Jorge’s text, who is quite obviously livid by this point. I have my phone in my lap and when we arrive at Mel’s truck she says, “Don’t forget your phone.” And I’m feeling around my lap and the floor and it’s GONE. Just gone. I had literally just texted Jorge 15 minutes prior. We looked and felt around and then we gave up. I couldn’t believe it was missing. Mel suggested that maybe it was on my lap but I dropped it in the parking lot. But I knew it had to be in the truck. I didn’t hear anything fall.

I get home, Jorge is pissed, naturally, and I strip down and shower because I have sand everywhere. We get into a quick fight and we both have to work in the morning so he takes his usual spot on the sofa and I go to bed. I feel like I went to sleep and woke up in 30 minutes. I feel like absolute shit and then I remember my poor phone is missing. I don’t know if it was the panic and sadness of losing my phone, or the amount of alcohol I had the night before or if it was my anxiety (or all of the above) but I was chihuahua-shaky all day with heart palpitations. It was awful.

Still, I held out hope all day that Edith would find my phone in the truck somewhere. I call it several times and it’s already dead and it hasn’t been charged so maybe someone didn’t pick it up in the parking lot. When I get the text from Mel that, nope, it’s nowhere to be found in the truck, I want to cry. I ask my boss if I can leave early so I can check if we dropped it in the parking lot of the mall (I knew it was a long shot), where we’d left Mel’s truck before leaving to the island with Edith. He lets me (he’s a saint) and I leave and arrive at the parking lot. I walk, in tall-ass heels, a flowy dress in the wind and with a badly bruised knee (my bad knee, to top it off), throughout the parking lot, checking under cars in 100 degree weather and nothing. Not even little shards of glass where someone may have run it over (I could have at least gotten my memory card out 🙁 ). I even go to each of the restaurants in the area and ask if anyone found a phone and nothing. I check with the mall’s lost and found. Nothing.

I am, once again, swearing off alcohol. I can’t believe I was so stupid!

The next day comes and as I’m leaving to work in the morning I notice my stupid back passenger tire is going flat. Great. All I need. My boss and one of the Sergeants are having a brief meeting and I told them about the tire. They both said they saw it and I should take care of it now. So I go to the tire shop and I’m told both back tires are BAD; there’s hardly any tread left. So how much does this cost? A whopping $650. No phone for me this week!

Since I’ve grounded myself the only outings I’ve had this week are work, of course, going to Goodwill during lunch on Friday to purchase some books and then Dee’s little girl’s birthday party at Xtreme Jump on Friday evening. Mel and I met there with our girls and their friends. I had already gotten to 137.9 lbs. from the stress of the week, but I’m sure I gained 2 lbs back from having flaming hots with cheese and chili. It was so good, though. No regrets. But then Mel and I started talking about our night out at the beach and we started talking about OMG what if we get the Rona?? Our throats were feeling itchy and my nose was running. So I got home and made some tea and took my vitamins.

By the next morning, I was better, thank God.

Visited mom and John today (wearing a mask, social distancing and Germ-x’ing, just in case) and ate lunch with them. On the way to Whataburger, away from Mom, John and I talked about our current mental health. It’s crazy how similar we are.

So that’s where I’m at right now. Using my iPad and Messenger for communication. Yes, I feel sorry for myself and yes, I’m owning my mistakes. Thank goodness for upping my anti-depressant/anxiety meds dosage last month, or else I would have been a basket case. I’ve been pretty calm, all things considered, and I’ve only cried twice! So that’s some progress. Been reading (finished “Where the Crawdads Sing” that Sally gifted me on my birthday and finally finished “Big Little Lies”. Just started “13 Reasons Why”) and still watching 90-Day Fiancé: Where Are They Now? Currently watching the “Tell All” of Season 3. These couples are probably my favorite cause they’re so scandalous! They make me feel normal 😆 . Anyway. Here’s hoping my next post will be more positive.

My A.D.D. Always Kicks In

I’m still alive. Just been enjoying summer and at the same time, trying not to go completely batty having all 4 (loud) kids home at the same time LOL. I took for granted just how peaceful it was when the boys were in school during the day. The girls would get to sleep without being bothered. I could nap if I wanted to. Emily would take her afternoon nap when she was supposed to. But now the boys are constantly yelling; at each other or just, you know, randomly. Poor Emily wakes up screaming every time. The boys love to play with Alaethia, but she’s a little diva and can only take so much of their energy LOL. She’ll smack them and squeal for them to leave her alone.

My favorite thing to do when I have a chance, of course, is to surf the web. I probably have plenty of time to update my blog, but right when I log in to WordPress I somehow get distracted and start looking for Re-ment stuff on Ebay. I’ve become quite obsessed with those little miniatures recently. I’ve got Rachel to thank for introducing me to the world of minis! Shoot, I’ve even got Mom and Mary collecting them!

A Few Things

Those are just a FEW of the gazillion things I’ve collected the past few months!

I also get distracted by browsing through people’s photos on Flickr, search for decorating ideas on Flickr or I’ll chat on Twitter. I hardly even use my Myspace or Facebook anymore, either. I guess whoever’s following me on Twitter has the most up-to-date goings-on of my life.

And when I’m not plastered to the laptop I’m reading. I’m still on Breaking Dawn. Crazy shiz happening in that book. I won’t go into detail so as not to ruin it for anyone, but it’s crazy. I still think New Moon was probably my favorite. I CANNOT WAIT for that movie! So many awesome movies are coming out in the next few weeks, too!

So yeah, I’m doing great. Loving the awesome new, comfy living room. Not enjoying the scorching heat; we’re probably going to end up having to get a bigger central air unit: this one doesn’t feel like it’s cooling much anymore, probably due to the extra square footage and the fact that the heat index’s been 105-116 the past few days. Bleh.

As for the kiddos, Emily’s such a doll. I never knew what people meant when they said they had “happy babies” until I had Emily. It’s so easy to keep her happy. I don’t even have a problem lugging her around with me everywhere. As long as she’s in her sling, nestled near me, she’s completely happy :).

Alaethia, like I mentioned earlier, is turning into quite the diva. Everyone’s amazed by how much she speaks “for a two-year-old” but it’s really nothing new to me. She’s been a chatterbox since she was around 7 months old. Mario says she takes after me LOL. She’s really into her Noggin shows right now, especially “Max and Ruby”, “Ni-Hao Kai-Lan”, “Wonder Pets” (she sings the song ALL THE TIME!), and “Backyardigans”. I’m not too fond of those last two, but what can I do? LOL

I definitely need to start sitting down with her and teaching her the colors and alphabet. She’s excellent with shapes but she’s still confused about the other two. As for potty-training, she’s a pro, though she still has her accidents at night but not too often, thank goodness.

The boys are doing great, when they’re not trying to smack each other. But I separate them and what do they do? They’re together 10 seconds later, like magnets. Jaylen’s had some anger issues, which I can only blame on “middle-child syndrome” but we’re working on it. I have noticed that he’s gotten better.

Eenan’s usually the instigator when it comes to their arguments and physical fights but he’s a lovable kid at the same time. He’s usually the one who tries to calm Jaylen and Alaethia down when he notices that I’m getting frustrated. He’s having to learn responsibility for a pet since he’s got Daisy and Lady to take care of now. He’s not too happy about it sometimes, but I remind him that they’re really cute and someone would really love to adopt them and he gets right on task LOL.

We took the boys to the library this past Tuesday and they each checked out a stack of books. They were all excited about it that day and read for a good hour without being “told” to, but the novelty wore off. Eenan’s been more reluctant about reading. I’ve got to get them on some kind of schedule so that they know when they can and can’t play video games and when it’s time to read and learn and go outside to get some exercise. I don’t want them to become couch potatoes, or act like it’s the end of the world when they can’t pass a level on a video game.

Mario and I are doing great, I’m thrilled to say. Ever since I stopped working and he went back to his old job we’ve been on Cloud 9 again, like nothing ever changed. We’re spending time together, he’s actually getting to see the kids and we watch movies in the evening in the new living room (which is almost complete; Mario just finished up the shelves, we just gotta paint them), either by ourselves or Jason, Mirella and Adan come join us.

Almost-finished Corner Shelves

I’ve become quite the social drinker (LOL) and we have a few cocktails before bed while we watch TV, chat, or surf the web when the kiddos are asleep. I love that boy :).

Pineapple Rum Thingies!

Noelia should be coming over tomorrow and we have a dinner to go to. I’m hoping I can get some cleaning time in and I’ve really got to spend that gift card Pete and Sally gave us from Pier 1! Maybe on Sunday, if Mario gets a chance between all that extra work he’s got. It’s all for the family LOL. He’s quite the popular one!

Unexpected Rush

Sun., Apr. 26th – Mario and I got up as early as possible (at 8:30) and got ready. I called Mom to watch the girls and Eenan and Mario and I dropped Jaylen off at CFF. We went straight to Walmart to get the red paint for the flatscreen/entertainment wall and then to Home Depot, where we bought more joint compound for the texture on the walls, painting supplies and the taupe paint that’ll go throughout the rest of the living room. I can’t remember what else we bought, but it was, luckily, the last things we’d need to get the living room finished up.

We realized we were cutting it close, so I called my dad-in-law to please pick Jaylen up from CFF. He did and then at 11:30 I gathered the boys and we went to church. Yes. I finally made it to church after, what? A year? Awful, I know.

After church we went home, then I dropped Eenan off at CFF and Mario and his dad were already starting to work on the texture of the walls.

The Nook/Sunroom

When I came back from picking Eenan up Big Mario had set a chair and table with my laptop on it in front of the windows in the nook. I. Loved. It. I could sit there and watch the kids playing on the deck! There was a nice breeze and I sat with Emily on my lap watching Alaethia blowing bubbles. It was the best.

Everything went so quickly! By the time I knew it, the texture was dry so I changed and helped Mario primer the walls. We ate lunch and then Mario went to take a nap. Jorge called about an hour & 1/2 into his nap and told us the Lumber Liquidators place, where he got his laminate hardwood floors, was having a huge sale. Mario got up in a flash and, all paint-spackled as we were, went to the place.

I couldn’t decide what color of laminate wood I liked and then we saw the perfect one. It took some doing, but the guy gave us a really good price! We had to buy 10 boxes; he gave us 5 for $1/sq. ft. and then the other 5 boxes he charged at $2.19/sq. ft. The original price was $2.79–we got a steal!

When we got back home I had the dreaded task of helping Eenan finish his castle model project. I don’t know why I say I “helped” him…I mostly did the darn thing on my own since I didn’t want him to burn his flesh off with the glue gun. We got all the walls glued in and then he had the task of painting it gray. We needed to get a brick pattern going on, so I cut a little square out of one of my new dish sponges and I had him blot the square into black paint and onto the walls in a brick pattern. It ended up looking really awesome. He had to get into bed at 9:30, but I stayed up finishing the details till midnight. I am SO GLAD that I’m not working anymore!

Mon., Apr. 27th – John invited me to Kumori so of course I said yes and got ready. Mom and Alaethia stayed at home happily watching Noggin while Emily went with John and me. I had my Fiesta roll and ordered an Omega roll for Mario and took it to him at work. I didn’t get to chat with him long since we were rushing to get everything done and pick up the boys on time.

We stopped by Walmart and one of the first things I did was pick out the nook wall color. Mario wanted cocoa brown, but all they had were reddish-brown colors. Still I ended up finding one I liked:

Picking the Nook Color

Since Mario wanted cocoa brown I got the Hershey’s syrup I already had in the cart and matched it up to the last one, Sienna Redwood LOL.

It took a while longer to shop around since they’re remodeling the store. I’m assuming it’s going to look a lot like the new one in Penitas. It was hard to find some stuff. Still, I finished up with the shopping and was thrilled that I stayed within my budget!

Emily woke up and started grunting for her bottle as I was paying. She usually does that. I tried fumbling for my wallet and making her bottle until I made John take over. At least she didn’t scream her head off like the last time!

We got home and I unloaded the car, put the perishables away and went off to get the boys. As I was sitting with them watching TV I started feeling a little more and more nervous about the swine flu. Everyone was panicking. I couldn’t even find little bottles of Germ-X at the check-out and I think two cases had already been confirmed in Starr County. Or was it Cameron. Either way, both counties are in the Valley and that was just too close for comfort.

I ripped myself away from CNN so that I could start cooking. I stuck Emily in her sling and cooked and did laundry just fine. My back was hurting a bit by the time I was done, so I handed her over to Mom and washed dishes.

John came over before I was even done with dishes to print a report at Mary’s. Dork kept talking in a Forrest Gump voice and telling me, “Hurry up…Jannay,” because my middle name’s Jannet and he thought it was hilarious. So I started calling him John-nay LOL.

I was running all over the place doing stuff for the kids and Mario and I finally, 3 hours after I made dinner, got to sit down to eat.

I chilled out watching TV and surfing the ‘net that evening with the girls. Mario was off somewhere, probably outside with Adan or at Adan’s. Alaethia came up to me and asked me for milk. When I said she could have some and got up to pour her some she said, “Thanks. You’re a super good friend, Mom.” She says the cutest things, that girl!

Tues., Apr. 28th – Mario was off that day. We woke up late, as usual and Mom was already chilling out outside. She offered to watch the girls since we needed to go to Home Depot, yet again.

First we stopped at WB though, since we hadn’t eaten breakfast or lunch. I ordered a WB Jr. with bacon and cheese. I couldn’t eat in peace since the darn bacon smelled weird. Mario said it smelled fine. I pulled most of it out and prayed that I wouldn’t get sick with food poisoning.

When we were on our way to Home Depot I texted John to ask him WTF was up with the stinky bacon at his workplace. All he texted back was: “I tell you not to eat there” LOL

We got to Home Depot and went straight to the lamps and lighting. We needed a nice lamp for the nook area and we found the perfect one. It was actually two of them for $14.87!

We looked around and I fell in love with the bathroom lights I want to install when we re-do the bathroom…again.

We got the rest of the stuff we needed, mostly painting supplies, and went home. I picked the boys up and Mario stayed behind installing all the outlet covers and so on.

Emily had woken up with a little bit of congestion that morning out of nowhere. By the afternoon the cold was progressively worse so I decided to take her in to the doctor before she really couldn’t breathe well at night.

As I’m driving into the parking lot I think, “Shit!” I don’t ever think I’d seen the parking lot that full of cars, and I’ve gone to the doctor when it’s packed. I was lucky to get the last parking space. I walk in and my friend Elisa’s at reception. She puts her hand on her hip and says, “You’re not here because of Swine Flu, are you?” I laugh and tell her no, that Emily just has a cold, no fever. It hits me; no wonder the doctor’s office was packed! Everyone there thought they had swine flu!!

I had Emily in her car seat and the car seat on my lap since there wasn’t any space on the bench I was sitting on to set it down. As heavy as it was, there was no way I was going to put the car seat with her on the floor because there were kids running around everywhere. This woman next to me, with three little girls, kept telling her (mucusy) kids to look at the baby. So of course they began putting their hands into the car seat to touch her. I almost hissed and told them to back off because she was sick, because apparently none of them thought that they were. When I’d finally had enough I texted Mario to please bring me Emily’s sling. I hadn’t brought it with me because it had been in the dryer. He brought it to me and helped me lug all my bags and the car seat to the car and helped me with Emily while I got her in the sling. I couldn’t thank him enough. I’d only taken out the most important things from my bag, left it in the car and only took Emily in the sling, her diaper bag and my book. Much better. And you can bet the kids didn’t try sticking their hands in the sling!

It was the longest wait ever. I even finished Eclipse while I was there! Emily was the very last patient, even though I was 4th to the last to sign in. Apparently the 3 people behind me had kids with fevers so they were taking them in first. We didn’t end up leaving the office till 6:20. They close at 5:30!

Mario had painted the nook wall with the brown color while we were gone. Although it wasn’t the paint we’d originally envisioned for that space, it came out looking pretty sweet.

The South Wall and Nook

Mario tried rounding up some of his friends to start installing the wood floors, but of course that didn’t happen. It makes my blood boil. Mario is always going above and beyond for his friends when they need help with stuff, no matter what it is, but when he needs something, are they there? That’s a big NO. He hates it when someone calls him up asking for help and I start bitching that he shouldn’t help them because of this or that. I hate being so mean and cynical, but I already know how some of his “friends” are after all these years. That’s just how Mario is, though. He’s nice. He wants to be there for people. I just wish some people would feel the same way about him!

The only person who did show up was Chris. He helped Mario install a part of the floor, about 3 rows since it was really late. Somehow–even though Mario works 10-12 hour days–we were going to finish up that floor that week.