Category: Family

Strange Feelings

Please, please everyone, take some time to pray for Becca and her new baby daughter, Addie. I can’t even begin to imagine what she and her family must be going through right now. My thoughts and prayers are with them. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about them all day .

I’ve had this strange feeling of…guilt? concern? I’m really not sure what, but I’ve been feeling weird all day. I’ve felt a bit lethargic the past few days and I don’t even know why. I don’t feel sick. I didn’t even go to Annie’s sister’s wedding because I’ve just felt drained of all my energy (Mario says sleeping only 6 hours a night is quickly catching up with me). It didn’t help that the boys have just been in foul moods today either. They’re a bit better now, but goodness they won’t stop fighting!

I also spoke to Mom and she sounded so sad. Her situation would be so much easier if she would just speak up for herself. She needs to understand that I can’t do everything for her all the time, as much as I’d like to. I just hope everything falls into place for her, for us. I don’t know.

I had a dream that I was pregnant last night. There could be a few reasons I had that dream:

1) I was thinking of Yadira (who I don’t think I’ve mentioned is PREGNANT!! FINALLY!! I’m so happy for them !).
2) I was thinking of Becca and wondering if she’d had Addie yet.
3) Brushka is pregnant, and we’d been feeling her baby(ies?) move.
4) I’ve run out of birth control pills and don’t know when I’ll be going back to Mexico for some *bites nails*.

In the dream John had his hand on my HUGE belly and was trying to feel for a kick. Everytime he moved his hand, she’d kick. When he’d put it back, she’d stop. It was weird because some people were saying “he” yet I knew that it was a “she”. When I woke up, I had that same feeling I did when I found out I was pregnant with Eenan. There’s no possible way I can be pregnant right now though, because it’s uh, that time of the month . I wonder what it means?

I finally got my own cell phone and we got it for free! Mario added my number to his account and they gave us the phone + 1 month of free internet. I’ve been going crazy dowloading ring tones thanks to Joe and Jennifer, who are friends from school. I also got a program, Pix2Fone where we can make our own wallpapers. I made one with a picture of the kids, which pops up whenever a call from the house is made. I love it. It only allows JPG format for now, but it’s cool anyway.

Mario just bought a Samsung PDA off of Jorge, which he was going to trade with me for my Samsung V1660, but I think I’ll just keep my phone. The PDA looks too…big? I wonder when we’re gonna get our Blackberry from school? We’re supposed to get it after our first grading period, which we already had.

Blah. I feel like I’m getting a darn cough. Mario’s finally home so I’m gonna be lazy on the couch with him. I fall asleep so quickly on the couch, wrapped in his arms .

Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.


Busy Busy Busy, As Always

Wow. I’m seriously taking forever to update my blog.

I’m constantly busy; it feels like I never get time to just sit and take a breather. It also seems like I only get to update when I’m done early with an assignment at school (finished my Key Terms first, yay!). Today for example, I have to drop some movies off at Video Plus, mail some letters, go home, change, make lunch for John, Jaylen and I; pick Eenan up from school and take the boys to the dentist at 2pm, then I have to pick Mom up (who will be waiting at Target after her doctor’s appointment), go and see Mario at work (he hasn’t seen the boys in literally 2 days), drop Mom off at home and THEN I can go home. When I’m home I’ll have to clean, cook, bathe the boys, get them in bed and get everything for school ready and bathe myself. Never get a break. My deepest appologies to those who’ve sent trade requests from The Pixel Train and The Quilting Bee — I will try my hardest to find some time to update. I haven’t even checked up on my cliques, and I know I’ve gotten lots of submissions lately. I won’t even count on the weekend to chill out in front of my computer because we have another wedding on Saturday and who knows what on Sunday. Boo.

Chris and Nancy’s wedding reception was lovely. Nancy looked so beautiful in her wedding dress. I was so envious of her pretty tiara. I half-joked to Mario that I wanted to renew our vows just so I could wear a tiara this time (I had no idea what I was doing when we got married, I let Mary make most of my choices and thinking back, I would have done so many things differently). Maybe one day *dreams*.

I felt horrible that night though. We’d gone to the mall to get the rest of Eenan’s school clothes and saw so many cute outfits I wanted. I even thought of getting a certain one at JCPenny, but thought, “Nah, I have my dress at home.”

When I was getting ready that night, I notice I’m INCREDIBLY over-dressed. Elda was even in JEANS. And everyone somehow failed to let me in on this. It took me an additional 30 minutes to finally find SOMETHING to wear, which ended up being my Back Up Dress–a black one with white flowers that is so out of style, that I’ve worn to everyone’s wedding/special occassion/funeral. I tried having a good night, despite my horrible attire, but that idea went out the window when this ho-bag Mario used to be friends with (who used to be a stripper) started parading herself around the ballroom trying to get Mario’s attention. She finally succeeded when she got in line behind us to take pictures with the bride and groom, and just said, “Hi Weesie!” (Mario’s nickname). She must have been satisfied after that because she just walked off and didn’t even bother taking pictures with them. I loathe people like that .

We left the wedding early and went to visit Maggie and Jorge for a while. I was so tired (and it was WAY passed my bedtime) that I don’t even remember half the stuff we talked about. Mario had a few beers so, as sleepy as I was, I drove home. Slowly.

Don’t remember much from Sunday. Oh yes, we went to the movies to watch Valliant, which actually didn’t suck as much as I thought it would. It was cute and the kids loved it. I had no idea they actually gave out real medals to animals during WWII.

I had to help Eenan get to bed early for his first day of school the next day. He looked so handsome in his new school clothes and I didn’t have any trouble waking him up. Ricci got here early, so we left by 7:15.

His teacher didn’t get there till 7:30.

After she got my info and talking with her about pick-up schedules I didn’t get out of the school till 7:46. We’re usually at school by 7:56–there was no way we’d make it on time. We got to school at 8:10. I appologized to Mrs. C-R, but she was very understanding.

We studied for our certification exams and our final exam that day. I had so much to do at home that day (grocery shopping, laundry and all the other daily chores) that I hardly got to study. I only studied while John, Jaylen and I waited for Eenan to get out of school.

I ended up getting a 97 on my final–and I was disappointed. That’ll probably sound incredibly anal and perfectionist-y of me (I’ve heard it from the whole family since I was moping around all day about it), but I knew the two answers I missed and put in the wrong ones for not paying attention. I could have kicked my ass. My class average is a 98. I’m one of the top 4 (the others have 98s too). I can live with it.

As for our bills and stuff: I used the money for my tuition to buy groceries. I had no choice. I went in to talk to the Financial Aid people about paying my loan on the 12th instead of the 5th and she happily wrote a note in my file. She said if I ever have trouble again to go ahead and let them know and we’d work something out. Big, big weight off my shoulders. I was so worried.

I feel so tired. We get to leave in less than 40 minutes. Getting out early since a few people who didn’t come in to take the exam yesterday are taking it today. Woo. I so want to get a chance to take a nap. But, since Brushka’s indoors now since she’s going to have me some kittens (I’m gonna be a grandma!), I need to bathe her and clean out her litter box and fix the trashcan lid so she won’t be getting in there anymore . She took a buffalo wing bone out last night and left it on the carpet in the living room. There were ants crawling all over the place *shudder*. We’ve had such a bad ant problem lately. I blame the children for sneaking food into the bedroom…

Woo. Almost time to go . I can get SOME chores done early.


Pity Party

I’m starting to think that maybe this whole school thing wasn’t such a good idea. Don’t get me wrong; I’m thrilled about going and I love what I’m learning, but I can’t think good thoughts and be happy about it when I’m not sure how we’re going to make it through the two weeks till Mario’s next paycheck. At this point, I’m not even sure how we’re going to buy groceries.

Mario was expecting a nice, hefty check this pay period. He’d done a big system in a Jeep and then he and Albert worked on that airplane. He made about $250 less than what we anticipated he’d make. I need to pay my damn tuition payment, which is $125. That money could go towards groceries, or things we need around the house. I was so excited when Mrs. C-R was telling us about our Word Expert Certificate exam. The best score is a 1000 and a passing score is 630. I’m almost positive I can pass it, not exactly with a 1000, but I can pass. She also said she’d give students who got a 1000 $25 out of her own pocket. She then told us if we pass all 4 parts of the test (Word, Excel, Access, and PowerPoint) we get our Masters as a Microsoft Specialist. THEN, she told us how much it would be to take the test: $70-$85. Doesn’t sound like too much, but when you’ve got all these other bills…

I seriously don’t know how we’re gonna do it . I started bawling my eyes out while we were talking with Mary and instead of Mario being compassionate and understaning he yells, “Don’t start. You’re pissing me off. I already told you I’d take care of it.” Real nice.

AND THEN, Aunt Nora and everyone else told Mom they don’t want Jaylen going over there. I don’t know why, but they don’t. If we ever get into the CCMS program, we were going to drop Jaylen off over there and Mom would watch him and she’d get paid for it (and she could finally quit her job). John and I could go to school together and all would be peachy. But, as luck would have it, things never seem to work out for me. I’m really pissed at Aunt Nora.

*sigh* Anyway, enough of that.

We got our study guides back…I got a 92 :), which is pretty darn good considering a lot of the class got 60’s. We did a quick review of Chapter 10, the last chapter before our exams on Tuesday. It’s safe to say I forgot every single thing. Mrs. C-R spent so much time getting some students “on the same page” that by the time she got to the next section, I’d already forgotten how to do the previous. Good thing I copied the files onto my jump drive; I’ll study them here at home this weekend.

I helped Mrs. C-R install Word 2003 to Lucy’s laptop and Mayra’s computer. Ricci and I didn’t leave school till 1. Went to pick up Mario’s check, cashed/deposited it at the bank (and almost side-swiped someone on the way there because my dumbass self always gets into the farthest lane instead of the closest. Mario constantly tells me not to do that and now I know why ), took $100 back to Mario for lunch, gas, and whatever else, went to H-E-B to get some pretty flowers for Mom since it’s her birthday, took them to her at work (she loved them !) and then we finally came home. I got down at Ricci’s to say hi to her grandma and we talked for a bit. I didn’t even get to call Rejeana to get directions to her house to go see Renetta and her new baby! I feel so bad. Gotta jot it down and remember to go see them.

I guess that’s it. I’ve done my bitching for today. Gonna TRY and watch XXX State of the Union with Mario and John. I feel so tired and sleepy already. Gotta wake up at 7:30 to go exchange Eenan’s clothes (we went yesterday, but Jaylen threw the most embarrassing fit on the floor of JCPenny, so we came home). I was supposed to get a haircut, but I don’t think I will. Eenan definetly needs one; gotta go do that too. I don’t even feel like going to the wedding anymore. Everyone’s gonna be all glammed up (nails done, hair styled/some highlighted) and I’m going to look like absolute crap. Blah, we also gotta go to Circuit City and get a few bucks back (thank GOD).

I never just get to CHILL OUT.