Inner Battle

I’m going to have to start making some changes. I don’t even know where to start.

I finally got to see Maggie and catch up with her after a month last night. She and Jorge came over to have some drinks with us and she told me all about her trip to San Antonio with her new boss. She’s doing fabulously at this new job and I’m so glad, too. She’s at the perfect place to help her already budding talent grow.

We talked till 3am (and it felt like it was still too soon for them to leave LOL). After Mario and I spent some time alone together (the baby was up with us late, too, since she didn’t seem to want to miss anything) we went to bed at 4am. Needless to say we didn’t wake up till noon. Well, the girls and I did. Thank God for Mary who drops the boys off for us in the morning!

I figured today would be the 2nd to the last or the last day of this cold/cough. Instead of feeling better I’ve felt shaky, dizzy and nauseous all day. At first I thought it was because I woke up so late and it threw me off, or because I hadn’t drank coffee in a week & a half, hence the jitteriness but I felt like that all day.

Mario and I picked up the boys while Mom watched the girls, then came back to drop off the boys so Mario and I could run some errands. We paid Mario’s speeding ticket ($149 down the drain, thank you) and I finally got Emily’s birth certificate. We looked for a new power supply at Radio Shack for the modem but Adan called him and said he had an extra one and would fix the internet for us (it wasn’t working). As we were leaving the store we saw a guy selling elote en vaso (corn in a cup) and Mario wanted some. As the guy starts preparing the cup, I nudge Mario and whisper, “The mayo’s not cold!” It was just there, out in the heat. I asked the man, in Spanish, if it was safe to eat and he said yes, he’d just made one before ours but he always kept it in a cooler with ice. He opens a cooler full of ice and shows us the indentation where the mayo usually rests. I feel a little better about it and order one, too. I was relieved to see him Germ-x’ing as well.

We went to Walmart for groceries because I’d been sick and hadn’t done the shopping during the weekend. We were even out of TP, which NEVER happens LOL.

On the way home I started feeling really nauseous. I started cursing the elote en vaso because I felt exactly the way I did last Monday when I got sick after Taekwondo.

Mom wanted to order a Botana so we went on a search for a Mexican restaurant down Tom Gill. Both of the restaurants on the street were closed. So we ordered from El Pato and came home to unload the groceries. Eenan’s helping me put stuff away and he double takes as he sees the gigantic love bite Mario left on me. 12 years with that man and he still thinks it’s hilarious to do that. I feel so embarrassed with those darn things! Anyway, Eenan double takes and says, “MOM! What happened to your neck!” I blurt out, “Your dad scratched me.” I closed my eyes and prayed he wouldn’t ask anything else, but of course he asks, “How did he scratch you like THAT?!”

I say, “I don’t know–get me that bag of cans.” Thankfully he left it at that, but he looked mighty suspicious.

Mario and I went to pick up the Botana after I was done. I was shaking and on the verge of puking by the time we got back. I couldn’t even smell the food, I was so nauseous. I tell Mario, “I think I’m starting to have problems with my glucose again,” and he says, “Um, yeah. I told you.”

I find my glucose meter and—as much as I hate to—checked my sugar. It was at 71 when I’d just had a whole cup of corn an hour earlier, which is really starchy and makes Mom’s sugar go through the roof. Everyone forced me to eat even though I couldn’t stand the nausea, but about half an hour after eating I started to feel better. John came over and ate with us and made me laugh, so that made me feel better, too; got my mind off of everything.

I’m going to have to get on the “Diabetic Diet” that I was following May 2008. I had to eat 6 small meals instead of 3 regular ones, or actually 3 small meals and 3 snacks in between. The only thing that worries me is Taekwondo. Because of all this I’m probably only going to go the remainder of the month. It makes my blood sugar drop A LOT and I don’t want to have an episode ever again like I did last week.

After dinner Mario went to Adan’s to get the modem fixed and I watched Biggest Loser while the boys played their handhelds (they’re excited that Mario found some…thing for their DS’s). When it was time for them to shower and go to bed for school I came to the bedroom with Emily and she happily played in her playpen while I cleaned up the bedroom. Alaethia watched The Wizard of Oz in her room.

My bedroom was a freaking mess; crap everywhere from all over the house that we didn’t know where else to put. So I got laundry, trash, closet and garage sale piles going on. I’m hoping to have a garage sale soon, but with this heat and spontaneous rainy weather we’ll see how that goes.

I watched the VMA’s, finally, while I cleaned. The Michael Jackson tribute was amazing! I was emotional the whole time. When the awards first aired on Sunday I saw Twitterworld going crazy about something Kanye did to Taylor Swift. He’s such an idiot, I swear. Why the heck didn’t a bodyguard or security or something tackle him to the ground? I think it was so gracious and awesome of Beyonce to give Taylor her moment. I got emotional during that part, too. This period of mine needs to come soon, for real. I’ve been a ball of absolute hormones since I’m…15 days late. No, people, I’m not pregnant! My cycle just goes completely wonky when I start a new workout routine. From doing absolutely nothing (well, not really, I was doing the treadmill) to TAEKWONDO my body REALLY freaked the hell out!!

Plan for tomorrow: finish up the bedroom. I need to get my bookcase dusted, books reorganized, side table cleared off and the closet organized. Everything that belongs in it is in it but all over the floor. Looks like the closet barfed. I blame that mostly on Mario who messes with the wires he’s got up there and decides to throw my boxes and hangers everywhere and doesn’t put them back. Hmph.

Oh yeah, and I’ve got to get the girls’ closet cleaned out. They’ve got tons of clothes they’ve grown out of.

I’m hoping I’ll get to make it to Taekwondo tomorrow. I feel lazy and gross going a week and a half without doing anything physical. I’m worried that’ll become a problem once I stop going to Taekwondo but now that I know what the workout is (and that I have to do it for an hour as opposed to 30 minutes like I was doing before) I think I’ll be alright.

OMG and I have to mention that Emily started making “a face”. She gets really happy and starts smiling all big with her eyes all crinkled up. Cutest thing EVER. I actually caught all these silly expressions on camera so I’ll hopefully get those up soon :).

I’m babbling now. Obviously time for bed.

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