Category: TV

I am so mad at myself. And this happened to me because of me, which is the most frustrating part. I can’t even blame anyone else!

The one thing I feared happening, happened. I lost my damn phone. It was a beautiful, holographic Samsung Note 10 with a cute case and glittery Pop Socket. All my photos!! My eBooks!! My memes!!

I’m most devastated about my photos. And my darn memory card. I have never lost a phone in my life. And all because I went somewhere when I should have stayed home. I even had a FEELING I should stay home. Why don’t I ever listen to instincts??

It all started Monday, Labor Day. I slept in a little and was going to spend the day cleaning and watching Season 3 of 90 Day Fiancé: Where Are They Now? But first, I made French toast for the kiddos.

I started laundry and ate 2 pieces of French toast. Yes, I had carbs–you would have, too. These slices of bread had BERRIES in them. Then I get a message from Mel around 1pm asking if I wanted to meet her and her friend Edith at Yardhouse. I was feeling incredibly lazy, comfy and I hadn’t even showered, but she said we could meet at 3pm. I got ready in a hurry and met her at her house and we took off together to Yardhouse.

We had a good time catching up and gossiping and talking about our lives and our plans. Then we got to talking with Edith when she arrived. We had drinks, and shots and more drinks. Then we ended up at the beach on a Monday evening when I have work the next day [insert facepalm emoji here]. It was around this time that I thought, Shit. I should have stayed home.

We laughed, we drank some more, we had fun, I somehow fell and scraped my knee with sand and then we head home around 1am. (Neither of us were driving, by the way.) I hear my phone so I answer Jorge’s text, who is quite obviously livid by this point. I have my phone in my lap and when we arrive at Mel’s truck she says, “Don’t forget your phone.” And I’m feeling around my lap and the floor and it’s GONE. Just gone. I had literally just texted Jorge 15 minutes prior. We looked and felt around and then we gave up. I couldn’t believe it was missing. Mel suggested that maybe it was on my lap but I dropped it in the parking lot. But I knew it had to be in the truck. I didn’t hear anything fall.

I get home, Jorge is pissed, naturally, and I strip down and shower because I have sand everywhere. We get into a quick fight and we both have to work in the morning so he takes his usual spot on the sofa and I go to bed. I feel like I went to sleep and woke up in 30 minutes. I feel like absolute shit and then I remember my poor phone is missing. I don’t know if it was the panic and sadness of losing my phone, or the amount of alcohol I had the night before or if it was my anxiety (or all of the above) but I was chihuahua-shaky all day with heart palpitations. It was awful.

Still, I held out hope all day that Edith would find my phone in the truck somewhere. I call it several times and it’s already dead and it hasn’t been charged so maybe someone didn’t pick it up in the parking lot. When I get the text from Mel that, nope, it’s nowhere to be found in the truck, I want to cry. I ask my boss if I can leave early so I can check if we dropped it in the parking lot of the mall (I knew it was a long shot), where we’d left Mel’s truck before leaving to the island with Edith. He lets me (he’s a saint) and I leave and arrive at the parking lot. I walk, in tall-ass heels, a flowy dress in the wind and with a badly bruised knee (my bad knee, to top it off), throughout the parking lot, checking under cars in 100 degree weather and nothing. Not even little shards of glass where someone may have run it over (I could have at least gotten my memory card out 🙁 ). I even go to each of the restaurants in the area and ask if anyone found a phone and nothing. I check with the mall’s lost and found. Nothing.

I am, once again, swearing off alcohol. I can’t believe I was so stupid!

The next day comes and as I’m leaving to work in the morning I notice my stupid back passenger tire is going flat. Great. All I need. My boss and one of the Sergeants are having a brief meeting and I told them about the tire. They both said they saw it and I should take care of it now. So I go to the tire shop and I’m told both back tires are BAD; there’s hardly any tread left. So how much does this cost? A whopping $650. No phone for me this week!

Since I’ve grounded myself the only outings I’ve had this week are work, of course, going to Goodwill during lunch on Friday to purchase some books and then Dee’s little girl’s birthday party at Xtreme Jump on Friday evening. Mel and I met there with our girls and their friends. I had already gotten to 137.9 lbs. from the stress of the week, but I’m sure I gained 2 lbs back from having flaming hots with cheese and chili. It was so good, though. No regrets. But then Mel and I started talking about our night out at the beach and we started talking about OMG what if we get the Rona?? Our throats were feeling itchy and my nose was running. So I got home and made some tea and took my vitamins.

By the next morning, I was better, thank God.

Visited mom and John today (wearing a mask, social distancing and Germ-x’ing, just in case) and ate lunch with them. On the way to Whataburger, away from Mom, John and I talked about our current mental health. It’s crazy how similar we are.

So that’s where I’m at right now. Using my iPad and Messenger for communication. Yes, I feel sorry for myself and yes, I’m owning my mistakes. Thank goodness for upping my anti-depressant/anxiety meds dosage last month, or else I would have been a basket case. I’ve been pretty calm, all things considered, and I’ve only cried twice! So that’s some progress. Been reading (finished “Where the Crawdads Sing” that Sally gifted me on my birthday and finally finished “Big Little Lies”. Just started “13 Reasons Why”) and still watching 90-Day Fiancé: Where Are They Now? Currently watching the “Tell All” of Season 3. These couples are probably my favorite cause they’re so scandalous! They make me feel normal 😆 . Anyway. Here’s hoping my next post will be more positive.

Mom and I both had doctor’s appointments yesterday. I remember when all I had to do was drive her and wait with her, but now I’m taking the appointment right after hers *sigh*.

It’s been 3 months since my last doctor’s appointment. Got blood work done. I’m really terrified to find out the results of my cholesterol screening, since I haven’t exercised at all since July and haven’t exactly had the best diet lately =\. The positive side is that–even though I FEEL heavier and was eating like crap–I didn’t gain weight. In fact, since my last appointment in June/July, I LOST 5 pounds.

I also asked the doctor about my darn acne. It’s gotten better since June, but I wish it would just GO AWAY ALREADY. He started me up on a pill again and a new gel, so we’ll see how that goes.

We’ll see how Mom’s results are, too. She wasn’t too keen on going, so I’m pretty sure she hasn’t been eating well *sigh*.

By the time we got home from the doctor and waiting for prescriptions it was almost 11am. Being stuck by needles encouraged me to have a healthy breakfast, as much as I wanted that darn Captain Crunch Berries cereal :(.

I cleaned up my bedroom after (somewhat) and organized my nightstand. Then I got ready for work and took off.

It was a slow day at work. Replied to a few e-mails, organized some bills, dropped off an invoice and that was really it. I was hungry by 2pm so I had a Campbell’s soup drink. Then we get an e-mail from Rosie that a company left us some pastries and fruit from Corner Bakery Cafe. FML. I shoulda just had fruit, but I had a piece of bread, too. No willpower, I tell you!

My boss left early and then it was time for a grand-re-opening Ribbon Cutting for Kohnami. It’s under new management and remodeled (it’s been forever since we’d gone there; I think the last time was for Michelle’s birthday last year and it still looked kinda raunchy >_<). We did the RC and then they fed us. OMG. Sushi. Boat. [caption id="attachment_2474" align="aligncenter" width="300"] Sushi boat at Kohnami![/caption]

The food was so good. I only served myself 5 little sushi pieces (I can eat around 10!), some rice and edamame.

Wally and EZ kept Michelle, Marie, Rick and I laughing. It was a blast. I ordered some rolls for my love (50% off, can’t beat it!) and was home by 6pm. I called the kiddos, got a summary of their day (the boys were playing Super Smash Bros together and the girls did the usual, like play Littlest Pet Shop and watch their customizing/baking/Littlest Pet Shop/Minecraft videos on YouTube). I rolled out of bed, where I’d been talking on the phone to the kids, and put on my workout clothes. I had told myself all day I was going to run because I ate that bread, heh. I seriously want to get into a routine again, and since Jorge was working and the kids aren’t here this weekend I had no excuse. So I went outside, where mosquitoes swarmed me, and watered my succulents. It was thundering and turning dark fast, so I went inside.

It took me forever to just START running. I put on Biggest Loser on NBC while I ran. I did 30 minutes (5 of those were spent vacuuming under the treadmill LOL) and I was EXHAUSTED. I couldn’t get control of my breathing.

Jorge got home and he ate his dinner while I showered. We watched “The Knick” for a while. I was getting hungry so I made us a snack :).

I managed to stay awake long enough to finish watching “We’re the Millers” and the rest of the most recent Sons of Anarchy episode. I fell asleep when I was watching each one the first time, surprise, surprise!

It was Karina’s birthday party that night at Ice House, but it started at 11pm and I was already falling asleep by 11pm =\. Jorge and I had discussed earlier in the day if we’d end up going.

It just seems like such a TASK for me, getting ready, driving, staying awake that long =\. Plus, if I wasn’t already sleepy and I have one drink, I’ll for sure GET sleepy. Had it been earlier, we might have gone. I hope she wasn’t offended :(.

Plus, we had to be up early for the boys games, and they were both far. I was already running late when Jorge barges into the bathroom, upset, because the boys mother didn’t wake up on time to drop them off for their game after a night of partying. I can’t believe that crap. No shame whatsoever!

But anyway. I already ranted about that earlier, heh.

I get to the school and squish my way to the bleachers. The grass was still wet from the rain and mosquitoes were everywhere. Thank God Mary had some OFF. We sprayed the girls and ourselves and the girls had their breakfast while we watched. Poor Jaylen’s teams lost. And since he played the entire game 2 weeks ago (they cancelled last week’s), they let the other boy play the entire time. Jaylen just went in for a while.

But at least I got to see them all :).

I waited for Jaylen and he told me about his thoughts of the game while we picked up some McDonald’s for him. I dropped him off and saw Eenan for a bit, till the GIANT mosquitoes started flying all over the place. There’s been 2 cases of West Nile in the Valley, so that makes me super nervous =\.

The skies turned gray as soon as I drove away and it started to drizzle. I went to Dollar General to pick up some birdseed. I was actually hoping to find a hummingbird feeder for cheap, but I didn’t, grr. I did, however, find some bags of soil for $0.30 each!

I got home, ate my oatmeal I picked up when I got Jaylen McDonald’s and now I’m here, typing. We need to go see Gramma and then Mom wants to pick up El Pato. Maybe I can convince her to pick up something at Salads Plus!

Going back on this post…I realize my life really does revolve around FOOD hehe!

Starting this post off with the more vexatious part…

Remember how I mentioned in my previous post that I’d need lots of patience this week? I was most definitely correct in my assumption. I’m usually pretty patient with people; I’ll brush something off if I’m bothered. But I just haven’t been able to brush this one thing off and I’m afraid I’m going to explode. I really do. I’m not the only who shares these feelings (which I’m relieved about! I’m not being oversensitive!), but when you’re going up against someone who gets their way 99% of the time, it’s difficult to see the light, y’know? I just think one should be more humble, more kind, but from what I’ve gathered in conversations with others, it’s just not in this person’s nature. And it’s sad.

Ahhhhh. See, now that’s better. I got my bit of therapy. Which reminds me of this article. I couldn’t agree more with it! Aside from chronicling my life, and my children’s lives, my blog (and “paper” journal) have truly been therapeutic for me.

So, anyway. I woke up at 5am Monday morning and told myself that I was going to kick that day’s ass. I dropped my boys off at school after we picked some Gatorades up for them. I got to work, went to our meeting, and when I got to my desk I wrote out a to-do list. I crossed out every single damn thing by the end of the day. I even had a work-related trip to Hobby Lobby, woo! I had to attend the Honduras Consulate ceremony at 5pm, which I’d forgotten about. I met my boss and Bob there and the first thing that happened was I was ushered off to the buffet table.

I was amazed by the unique spread. I didn’t even know what to ask for, so I went for a seafood soup and a type of bean and cheese taco in a flour tortilla. They were both AMAZING. The soup had a buttery, cheesy flavor. The Consul asked the man that made it (who also works at the Consulate) what ingredients made the soup “yellow” and he said it was “curry, saffron and a hint of mustard.” It was just so delicious!

I got home after the ceremony and Mom had already bathed and fed the girls. I helped them with homework, made Jorge dinner, read the girls their books and put them to bed. And then I sat with my love and painted.

I got those tiny pots at Hobby Lobby so I could plant my succulent leaflets in soil, now that their mother leaf was shriveling up.

These are the leaflets that have “made it” thus far, in their same planter. I’m still not sure WHAT I’m supposed to do with these (how often to water now that they’re in soil, for example), but they looked big enough to plant.

Tuesday was spent preparing for my event the next day. I’m thrilled that Michelle will be working with Laura and me on that one now :). It was a pretty normal day, except for having reception duty for a while in the afternoon. Then I went to HEB, got home and dropped the soap and supplies off, then John, the girls and I went to Wing Stop to pick up dinner.

Jorge was home right on time, we ate, and then I put the girls to bed after checking homework and then I happily snuggled on the sofa with my love, which caused me to pass out halfway through Sons of Anarchy. He’s never surprised anymore, heh. He’s the best, though, ’cause he pauses the show till we can watch it together when I’m conscious :).

I took Emily to test in the morning on Wednesday, dropped the girls off at their classes and then I met Michelle, Laura, Ivan and Thelma at the event. We had a great turnout, thank goodness! It was fun, and went smoothly, albiet about 20 minutes longer than usual.

I got to the office and immediately get a call from my boss to drop his camera off at their meeting at the Convention Center. Jorge and I were meeting for lunch, so I asked him if he wanted Subway in the plaza near the Convention Center. He said sure, so we meet there after I drop the camera off. We walk in, and posted on the sneeze guard is “Cash Only”. We never carry cash. So it was either Kumori or Johnny Rockets. Guess which one Jorge and Marco picked, heh.

It was such a great experience! I’d been there before with the guys from work, but this time they went all out. The customer service was great, music was great (thank you, Mother, for introducing me to this music since birth!), we got a show (the waiters and waitress danced for us!), and they served my ketchup in a smiley face!

Jorge said, “You just can’t be mad here. You can’t.”

I slide my head over and whisper, “I’m bringing you here when you’re mad then!”

I spoke to my boys on the way home from work. Eenan was having a bit of a teenage thing with his dad about curse words and he was venting. We talked about his day, like we usually do. I vented with him about something that was annoying me. And then I spoke to Jaylen, who sounded a bit croaky ’cause his school-issued chin-guard slipped off his chin and clocked him on the throat during football practice :(. We’d ordered some mouth-pieces and chin-guards for our 3 football players, but Jaylen’s chin-guard was missing a metal clip. I told him Jorge and I would replace it.

I get home and Mom had already fed and bathed the girls (woo! Bless her!), so that gave us a chance to paint together at the table, while I thawed some fish. They finished painting their mini pots and while I painted mine, they decided they were hungry again so Emily made herself some PB&J and Alaethia made herself a SALAD. Yes, a salad. She loves them. She asked me, “Mama, why don’t you make salads anymore?” Which made my stomach sink. I really SHOULD be making salads *slumps*.

I finished my pot:

And then the girls played. Mom stayed with them while Jorge and I went to put gas in my truck and replace the clip for Jaylen, which we did. Now my poor boy will hopefully not have that problem :(.

I actually stayed awake (for the most part) to watch “Are You Here?” That was pretty depressing! And Zack Gallafinakis (sp?) should never NOT have a beard :P!

Today was another productive day. Walked the girls to their classes. I’m so glad both are doing so much better in the morning. Emily’s attitude towards school now is like night and day!

We had an impromptu photo shoot today (well, impromptu for me, anyway) which went into lunch. I thought I missed the seminar I was supposed to attend, but I arrived only 5 minutes late. It was supposed to last 2 hours, but it only lasted around 30 minutes O_o. I got out of there, talked to the girls a bit and ate my Jason’s Deli at my desk. Of course finishing the chocolate chip cookie first. What is it about me and sugar?!

The afternoon went by fast. Did some planning regarding the Food Festival. And then I was on my way home. Jorge arrived with Jorgie and Justin and I moped about cooking. Jorge said, “Get the chicken out, I’ll cook.” I stared idly into the cabinets and I said, “It’s ok, I’ll figure it out…” I left the kitchen, came back in and he said, “Get out of here, I’m cooking.” Woohoo! You don’t have to tell me twice!

I lay in bed and called the boys while my love cooked. We talked about their day; Eenan’s excited about Super Smash Bros demo coming out at midnight and Jaylen didn’t have practice and got to relax. And read :).

Jorge came to snuggle with me…and we both passed out!

He woke up before me and finished up with dinner. It was amazing!

I got some comments on Instagram, which eventually led to me flipping through my photos and I was sad to see how “healthy” my posts were 2 months ago. I turned my laptop around and showed Jorge. I said, “Look at those healthy meals! And that watch with burned calories on it!”

He says, “If that watch cost money, you better use it.”

He realizes what he said. I turn slowly and say, “Um. How about that exercise thing you bought??” He smacks himself on the head and says, “Stupid Jorge. You walked into that one!” Buahaha.

I had said, at 9pm, that I was giving myself 30 minutes to allow my food to settle so I could get on the treadmill. It’s now 10:47pm and instead I’m blogging. Lord help me. I need to start exercising again. I feel so lazy and sloppy :(. And to make matters worse, I’ve not been eating as well as I should be, and my 3 month-check-up is tomorrow morning. Ay Dios Mio! I’m never getting off those cholesterol meds!

Wish me luck!