Stop eating the damn carbs. JUST. STOP! You feel that gurgling in your belly? The indigestion? The discomfort? The BLOAT? It feels like you’re going to POP from how bad you feel right now. Do you LIKE feeling like you’re going to shit yourself if you cough or sneeze? HUH?? Do you?!
And these pants, that used to fit you huge? Well now they don’t fit. Now they make ripping sounds as you’re trying to pull them up over your ass, like just now when you went to pee. It’s lunch time in 20 minutes—and although you’re starving—you don’t even feel like eating because your belly might explode from the bloat. Oh but the concha you Cookie-Monstered this morning as you waited for Bentos to finish peeing outside was GREAT wasn’t it?? And how about the 2 conchas and the other 2 pan dulces you had last night, AFTER the Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger and onion rings from Whataburger???? WITH BUNS!! And then you WONDER why you feel like shit and why you’re breaking out!? And did you remember to take your probiotic? No, of course not. ‘Cause you’re too lazy to walk to the kitchen to get it from the fridge (and your zit cream, too!). Do you enjoy the feeling of not being able to breathe or like puking because you ate so many damn carbs??
Girl. You stress me out.
Quit using your period/PMDD as an excuse to fuck up your diet/way of eating/body. Because that’s exactly what you’re doing: making excuses to self-sabotage. And for WHAT?? To feel like shit?? To change 5 times every morning because you don’t like how your clothes fit? To walk around, moping, because you feel fat and uncomfortable in your clothes?? ‘Cause that’s all you’re doing!! Do you feel good about anything after you binge eat?? NO! You never do!! So quit doing it already!!! Faaakkk!!
It was so freaking awesome to have today off! I’ve only been at the new place for 16 days and I already had a day off 😀 .
I started my 3-day weekend by having coffee with Sally and her kiddos at Moonbeans. My kiddos were at their other parents’ for the weekend and Jorge was working late, so who better than to spend my Friday evening with? It’d been a while since I’d been to Moonbeans, but was pleasantly surprised that I could order an iced coffee with HWC and Torani sugar free vanilla! I don’t think I’d been there since before they remodeled.
We chit-chatted, and caught up–I need to see this girl more often! I love hearing her stories and laughing when we get together <3.
The kiddos were becoming antsy, so we drove to Bill Shupp Park just a block away. They played around and Sally and I tried getting the perfect selfie, but we were losing daylight and the kiddos started photo-bombing us 😆 !
It got dark and we went home. Jorge called to ask if I wanted sushi and well…who am I to deny my husband some sushi?? I haven’t been 100% Keto (and you can totally tell by my complexion 🙁 ), but I keep telling myself, “Just this time and then that’s it! Back to Keto!”
But look at that! Ugh. Like, there isn’t even a way to possibly make Keto Sushi with Flamin’ Hots! (Or is there…?? I must look into this!)
After my carb-fest, I passed out on the sofa shortly after trying to watch “Riverdale”. I swear I was on Season 2, Episode 4 for WEEKS because I always fall asleep! This is a show the kids and I got into during Christmas vacation (or was it New Years?) and they’ve all gotten so much more ahead than me!
So Jorge left to work the next morning and I lazied around in bed till I was good and ready to make breakfast.
I FINALLY finished that episode of Riverdale…just to realize it was my last one! So disappointing!
So that brought an end to my lazying, unfortunately.
I started tidying up the kitchen (as much as I can; I need to really give that place an overhaul! We have so many random cups and storage containers 🙄 ) and I started watering and cleaning up my succulents.
Jorge got home from work and I made him lunch, only to get into it about money, 🙄 . Men, I swear. He left and I went about my day.
I went outside to check on my plants and realized my rescued cacti is on drugs…not sure exactly what is going on here LOL.
I filled up my pink Yeti with some Starbucks blonde roast, heavy whipping cream and Torani SF sweetener–this would serve as my “Lunch”. Then, Mom and I left to the cemetary to change out Gramma’s decorations from Valentine’s to Easter. As much as I love to decorate, I just feel…strange? Not even sure how to describe how I feel going to the cemetary. I mean I know I’m “visiting” Gramma’s body, but maybe it’s because I’m with Mom that I feel like I can’t totally just be with her and speak to her. I just miss her 🙁 .
I finished tidying up her space and we came home. I was supposed to go grocery shopping but I didn’t feel like it, so I started tidying up my closet. I love shopping (thrifting, mostly!) and my closet has just EXPLODED with clothing that I can’t put any clean clothes away sometimes, then my computer chair gets messy because that’s where I “store” them. So I got rid of a trash-bag full of clothes that I haven’t worn for over a year, and that bag will probably sit in my garage for a month before they make their way to Goodwill, heh.
I tried sticking to Keto all day, but I started festering anger in my chest about Jorge and my argument earlier (because that’s what I do) and decided to clean up the dining room table, but not before devouring the last 5 chocolates in 2 different chocolate hearts I “found”. Hey, I’m human, and that’s unfortunately how I cope: by devouring shit that’s bad for me and will make my face explode in acne.
Still, I was starting to feel hungry, so I browsed through the fridge. Hmm. Everything required cooking. I just so happened to find 1 Corona, and 1 Michelada picante mix so you know what happened after that:
No regrets. It was the best damn Michelada I’ve had in a long time! (I don’t think anything will beat the one we had at La Jaiba that one time, though!)
Anyway, I happily took my Michi with me to my desk and caught up on my blog posts. Now that only leaves about 5 more that I need to finish! FML.
Jorge started texting me around that time and never really apologized LOL, but we got to chatting about why he exploded. He was feeling run-down and underappreciated in all different ways–but I told him that’s still no reason for us to argue because I won’t hold back lol.
Made us some nice eggs and bacon. Was thrilled until my egg popped 😕 and Jorge rolled his eyes as I bitched about it 😆 . But it was still delish. Does anyone else use their bacon strips as “chips” to scoop your yolk with??
I used to have an obsession with scooping my yolk with Doritos 😆 , so this serves as a substitute.
Jorge and I caught up on a show, and then he had to go in to work. I used the time alone to go to HEB and finally do some shopping to get it over with. (I love to eat and cook but despise grocery shopping. And shelling out $200 almost every time isn’t thrilling either 😕 .) I got home and cleaned and instead of making a nice dinner, Mom treated us to Wingstop instead :D.
Robert M. came over to visit the hubs. They had a few beers outside on the porch and came in later on. We caught up on life and my new job and everything else.
We went to bed when Robert left. I didn’t know what to do the next morning: lazy around and read, go to World Market to use up my gift card, blog, or take a quick run in the morning.
I woke up today to the doorbell. My poor Alaethia had a terrible stomach ache so she stayed home. All the boys were off for President’s Day as well, so poor Emmos was officially the only one who went to school that day :(. Alaethia rested on the sofa and I made myself the best Keto Krepes, ever. I wish I had some sugar free syrup to add to them, but the last time I tried buying some, I realized it had tons of carbs still! But, I just added some Kerrygold Butter on top of these and I finished the whole thing!
Linda and I chatted a while and then I showered and Alaethia and I went to visit my peeps at the Chamber to turn in a box of supplies I still had and the Parks-n-Rec. key for the bathrooms. I got to see Rosie, Sarah (who said, “Quedate!!” Stay!! LOL), EZ, Blanca and Gerry, Beto, Anabel and the new girl they’re training to take over her place (she’d be taking Sandra’s old position). I went upstairs and saw Jorge and we chatted a while, Tom, Michelle, and I chatted with Luis, my old supervisor, for a while. I missed everyone else since it was already noon. As much as I miss my old workplace and my co-workers, upon seeing the piles of papers on my old boss’ desk, I’m kind of relieved that I don’t have to deal with that anymore 😆 . This is the “busy season” and I’m sure I’d need a Xanax or meditation by now if I were still there!!
Alaethia and I finished up at the Chamber and left for lunch. She was feeling better and the first thing she could think of eating was Taco Bell 🙄 . So I called Jorge up and we picked him up to eat lunch.
I tried getting the most Keto-friendly thing possible: a bowl. I didn’t know the bottom layer was rice, so I left it. And then it was time for Snapchat LOL.
We dropped the hubs off and then we headed to World Market, must to Alaethia’s chagrin. She wanted to be home, watching videos on YouTube 🙄 . We took our time looking around and Alaethia loved it. She especially loved the candy section 😆 . She picked some items for her and Emily and I got a mug rack, some coasters for our new nightstands, Martini glasses that were on clearance and super cheap, Torani syrup and another pump.
Jaylen had been dropped off while Mary went to pick Eenan up from school. Emmos got home and then I started chopping up my poor, overgrown bougainvillea. After almost 7 years and Jorge’s constant nagging about how ugly it is, I finally decided to start the process of chopping it down 🙁 . The poor thing has been through hell (when we moved in, it was already ugly and chopped up LOL), but the hail storm in 2012, the roofers smashing it later on and then it cracking down the middle didn’t help. Now grass has taken it over so Jaylen helped me chop it up. I swore I’d be extremely store but I was ok. I had several cuts from the thorns, but I was grateful for Jaylen, and later Eenan, for helping me drag the giant branches to the curb.
I made some Keto Zuppa Toscana for dinner and had enough for leftovers at work, woo!
And then I had some Carb Smart Ice Cream with Lilly’s Dark Chocolate Stevia Sweetened Chips (that’s a mouthful!) for dessert.
(I was sitting at my desk with all intentions of pounding out this blog post, but I get distracted and am–undoubtedly–posting this 2 weeks later 😐 .)
All-in-all, it was a great weekend. Now I’m refreshed for a great week!
Everyone who knows me, knows how I feel about sushi. Eating Keto since the end of April is really making me crave it! A few months ago I tried my first shot at Keto sushi. It tastes incredibly similar to the real thing! All you need to do is grate some cauliflower in place of rice. I hope I can explain how to do this correctly! Please let me know what you think in the comments!
A fine cheese-grater
A half-head of cauliflower
A bamboo sushi rolling mat
Nori (seaweed wrap)
2 long strips of cucumber
Seasoned, cooked shrimp (I season with garlic powder, sea salt, freshly cracked pepper, cayenne pepper and dried parsley)
Half an avocado, thinly sliced and scooped
Spicy mayo (mayo mixed with sriracha)
Grate the half-head of cauliflower into a bowl, then microwave to warm up and let some of the moisture out.
Let cool just a bit. Meanwhile, lay some nori on your bamboo rolling mat. Note: if the nori has preforated lines on it, make sure those lines and the “lines” of the bamboo roller are “opposite”. The lines help you cut into your rolls easier. Spread a thin layer of the grated cauliflower on the nori, making sure to completely cover it. Then, at the very edge of the nori/cauliflower that is closest to you, layer your seasoned shrimp, a strip of cucumber, avocado, a few plops of cream cheese, some green onions, some spicy mayo as compact as you can.
Then comes the tricky part: grabbing the nori and bamboo mat and rolling it together over itself till you make a roll.
This is my 2nd time making these and I had more trouble this time with my nori tearing (probably because I didn’t let the cauliflower rice cool long enough), so don’t lose patience. The end-result is AMAZING!