Category: Weight/Exercise

I caught yet another cold which I thought was brought on by getting soaked putting groceries in the car at Walmart on Saturday. As crappy as I felt I went to work because I knew my boss was taking turns with relatives and taking care of her mother, who’d recently been in the hospital. She was off every other day and I’d just caught up with all our work (we’d been so behind thanks to our snail-paced internet) so I didn’t want to get swamped again.

I asked John to accompany me to the mall to return a blouse and buy some jeans. He said okay; he wanted to check out video games anyway. We’re walking around looking for the store (which they moved across town, thank you) and he tells me he’s starving. I wasn’t sure if I was hungry or not, but I knew for sure I needed a seat because I was feeling dizzy and my heart was racing like it had been for the past two weeks. Elvira kept telling me, “You need to get yourself checked, girl. That’s not right.” She’d actually been telling me about a month already but I was in denial. I pinned my lightheadedness, racing heart and jitteryness to the 6 1/2 hours between my breakfast and lunch.

So we’re standing in line at Quizno’s, where John wanted to get a sandwich, and as I’m trying to figure out what I want I feel like the room’s spinning. He looks over at me and says, “You don’t look good, you’re swaying. Eat something.” Again, I blamed it on my terrible sinuses and headache, but I listened and had some broccoli soup and a Sobe drink. We sat talking for a while and I began to feel better. We stopped by the other store, I found a blouse, and we rushed home because I needed to make dinner. By the time I was done with everything I was exhausted and felt awful again. My head hurt, my heart was racing again, I couldn’t breathe because my nose was so stuffed and my throat felt like it was on fire. I started wondering if maybe I’d caught Strep. I was about to get up to take a shower when my mom said, “Don’t go to work! Stay home and get better!” I said, “No, I have to go.” Mario passes by and tells me, “Don’t go in.” And after feeling like a turtle on it’s back trying to get up to shower, I realized they were right, I was too sick. They convinced me to go to the doctor the next morning, so I got into bed and woke up early to shower.

The boys had slept over at Mary’s, Mom was staying with Alaethia, and Mario was working so I went on my own. When I’m in the vitals room they ask what my symptoms are and I told them about my cold and asked if I could be screened for diabetes. They were a bit shocked and asked why. I told them how I’d been feeling awful for the past two weeks and I felt like I might have diabetes. Then I weighed myself: 128.7. Officially THE MOST I’ve ever weighed in my life.

When the nurse practitioner checks me she says my throat’s inflamed (but not Strep), I have a chest infection and Sinusitis. She prescribed some meds for the Sinusitis (which I just realized I need to take again), Zithromax for the infection and a steroid. Then she sent a nurse in to poke my finger to check my blood sugars. After 10 minutes I could hear a commotion outside; they were in disbelief that the reading was mine. My sugar was at 203, 2 hours after I’d eaten breakfast. The nurse walks in, her expression serious, and says, “Yajaira! I can’t believe it. You’re diabetic! I’m so sorry.” I tell her, “It’s okay. I kind of expected it. Not this soon, but I did.”

She gives me menus and pamphlets for my new diet. Everything must now be sugar free and diet and no sweets other than the ones in the menus, most of which are fruits. She wanted me to go in today while fasting to do labwork and get that glucose test done where you drink a really sweet punch; usually the one one when you’re pregnant. I said fine. She said we’d try and get me back on track by just doing my diet and exercising, but she was afraid I might at least need to be on a pill.

I went to the pharmacy to get my meds for my Sinusitis and everything and started texting, calling and messaging everyone to let them know. It hadn’t hit me until then, really. I got a little teary-eyed for a little bit, but pretended it was because I’d been coughing up a lung. It was so weird having to go back to Dollar General to exchange the cough drops I’d just bought that morning because they weren’t sugar free.

I get home and tell Mom and she’s in shock. She kind of just stood there staring at me for a little while, like she couldn’t tell if it was actually me standing before her. And then I started with my diet. Edith, the nurse practitioner was right, she said it was going to feel like I was eating all day because I’d be eating every 3 hours: 6, 9, noon, 3, 6pm and 9pm. I called my boss to let her know I wouldn’t be in on Friday either due to my labs and told her about my ordeal. She said we’d even move my lunch hour half an hour earlier so I’d stay on my 3-hour diet. I’m so glad she’s so understanding.

Although I felt like total crap from the infection and Sinusitis, Eenan and I both had dentist appointments. I got the boys out of school early and then Eenan and I went. We thought he’d need a crown, but he just got that same filling redone and another 2. I got two molars on top filled that really needed it, plus a small one between two teeth on top. I still have two more to get filled but I didn’t want to spend too much with all the medications I’d be needing for the diabetes. I’m so proud of Eenan; he did much better than I thought he would. He only screamed once when they injected the Novocaine. Shoot, I almost screamed, too.

Mario and I went to Jorge and Maggie’s that night to chill out. We spent some time laughing outside and then on Myspace while Joe cut Mario’s hair Chuck Liddell-style (from UFC). We got home pretty damn late and we slept about 5 hours. Not even the shower at 7:45am helped. We got to the Dr.’s office and they drew blood and I drank that gross drink immediately afterwards. Then we waited an hour. Mario forgot something to entertain himself with so we just read forwards on my Centro and then we sort of took a nap until it was time to get my results.

We went to the back to get my results: 222. I am officially diabetic. My lab results won’t be in till at least Tuesday, but those results will state what Type of diabetes I have and if I’ll be using pills or insulin. I asked if there was any chance of just stabilizing my glucose with just diet and exercise and Dr. Edith said no, I’d need pills at least. Blah. Totally not what I wanted to hear.

We went to the pharmacy to pick up my glucometer and strips and all that. It seemed surreal. As we stood at the counter getting counseled Mario jokes, “I didn’t think we’d be doing this till we were old.” That’s so true. I was hoping I wouldn’t start having symptoms till I was at least 40!

They taught me how to use the machine and off we were with my little pack, which I’ll have to carry with me from now on. I’ll have to check myself right when I wake up and 2 hours after I eat, which’ll be at work.

We ran some errands for Mary with Aly watching The Little Mermaid in her carseat and then stopped by Dollar General so I could buy some snacks, like graham crackers and Rice Crispies cereal. Mario cruelly bought some Oreo Cakesters and he and the boys ate them in front of me at Mary’s. I wanted to hit something. But I got over it. Although I do want them all to follow my menus to keep them healthy for the future, I can’t rip everything away from them =\.

I followed my menu for dinner and oh my gosh, I couldn’t finish the amount of food. The three main meals are actually really big meals–well, to me anyway. My “fruit” consisted of a third of a whole melon! I still need to ask my doc about certain foods; I’m confused about how much sugar I can actually have, because my 8 animal crackers have 7g of sugar. I wonder if that goes for everything else? As long as I follow the serving size and amount of sugar, I can eat it?

I took me three tries (and pokes) to get enough blood for a good reading on my machine. I was disappointed to find out it was still at 170 :(. I don’t want to have problems like this for the rest of my life :(. They called me a “Rare case” at the doctor’s office today. I’m, so far, one of the youngest females to develop diabetes.

I always thought I’d shrivel up and die if I got diabetes, but I’m not shriveled or dead! I’m okay. And I’m going to eat well and exercise. And hopefully the silver lining will be that I’ll lose some weight in the next coming months.

I was an emotional wreck four weeks ago.

The last time I updated Mario and I had a little argument (“little” being an understatement). I didn’t talk to him till the next day, partly because I didn’t see him till the next day. As always, he acted like nothing happened. He called in the afternoon on Saturday (March 1st) to invite me to dinner at Chili’s to “make up for yesterday.” I spent the morning at home and paid off our Volkswagon credit card and over half of Home Depot. Then I made Mario’s truck payment and yelled for everyone to get in the Equinox. All my kiddos, Mom, Mary and I were going to town. We went to all our banks, Mary paid a bill, the boys got games at Gamestop (with their own saved allowance), Eenan got a Halo toy and Digimon toys at Wal-mart, we went to see Mario so he could fix my signal lights, we bought chips at Stripes to hold off the boys till we met Mario for lunch, bought a cute chest (that we’re using for video game paraphernalia) at Big Lots, and made my Circuit City payment. I learned my lesson last month; they made me overdraft because I’d made the payment at the beginning of the month and it didn’t go through till the end before we got paid again since I only ever deposit enough for the online bills we have. We ate at Taco Bell with Mario, which was nice and we were civil. We went to see Gramma afterwards and then went to Target. We got home and I put the chest together. Then I waited for Mario to call and give me the okay to meet him at Chili’s. When I was giving Eenan a hug before we left I noticed he felt a little warmer than usual. He said he felt fine; that it was probably because he was covered with my comforter.

Mario and I got to Chili’s (seperately) at 10pm and stayed for about an hour and a half. I had my usual frozen strawberry Margarita and we ordered the Tripple Dipper (spinach and artichoke dip, boneless wings and fried cheese), and my favorite: shrimp Alfredo. There must be a shortage of shrimp somewhere because they only served me four miniscule shrimp. Grr.

Mario and I talked about different things: work, life, the kids and then something that’d being weighing on our minds for a week and a half: the possibility of me being pregnant.

I’d had the bright idea what seemed like 5 short weeks before to stop taking my pill to see if it would help with my weight-loss. In the meantime, I was looking for alternatives and we were being “careful”. Well, Elvira (Mrs. R. from work) and I usually “start” around the same time. Actually, she’s starting when I’m finishing. When I started panicking I asked her if she’d started already and she already knew why I was asking. She said no when I asked. But a day later, Friday, she called after work and asked if I’d gotten mine because she got hers. I was almost in tears. For those two weeks I kept thinking, “This can’t be happening! Alaethia’s too small to have a new sibling! I can’t be pregnant while doing my job and I like my job! Mario barely sees the other 3 kids. I’m barely getting 5 straight hours of sleep! I can’t go through this again! OMG I’m going to get fatter! OMG another college fund! 4 weddings!” And-so-on-and-so-forth.

It didn’t help that Mario wasn’t supportive at all. He was freaking out as much –if not worse– than I was. I had a little cry sitting there across the booth from him at Chili’s. He told me something that night that made me resent him a little; something I never thought I’d hear him utter from his own mouth. It may have just been because he was worried, but still, it’s unforgivable. And no, I’m not being overdramatic.

We woke up the next morning (Sunday, March 2nd) and just chilled out. We weren’t going to get to do much since we had a meeting from 2:30 to 4pm for Eenan’s First Communion class. My Equinox needed an oil change and we needed a few groceries so we figured we’d go to Walmart. Well, the lines at the auto place were super long so we just got a few things. We went home and then sat, rather confusedly, through the Communion class. It had absolutely nothing to do with Communion. They were chanting and screaming and then did some play where I know there was a lesson in there somewhere but man, I was confused. We all were. Mario up and left outside with Jorge and Yazmin. When we were done we packed up Alaethia and her things, left the boys with Mom and then went to Comp USA since Mario wanted to get memory and a harddrive for the ol’ E-Machines so he could rebuild it for himself. It was closed. We went to Circuit City to look for the stuff there and I asked about the laptop on sale in the ads. We’re still joking about it now: Mario says he has no idea how it happened, but he nodded yes and all of a sudden I own a new 15″ Toshiba laptop, heh. Problem solved. He wanted his own computer and I wanted a smaller one. We’d end up spending the same amount for everything he wanted to get to rebuild the desktop, so it worked out. He kept my “old” 17″ Toshiba and I kept the smaller new one. I got my anniversary gift early :).

When we got home I checked on the boys and was startled when I gave Eenan a hug and he was burning up. Paul had just gotten here so Mario could do some work on his van’s system, so I gathered all my stuff, left Aly and Jaylen with Mom, while Mary called around to check which pediatrician’s were open on a Sunday night.

She found a place in Mission that had just opened and we left. They were pretty fast there. I gave Eenan a pep talk and warned him that they were going to do a swab test in his throat to check for Strep, because I could bet a thousand bucks that’s what was ailing him. He acted like he was brave and ready, but when the nurse walked in with a lancet to poke his finger (to check his blood for infection) and the long q-tip, he freaked out and started screaming. He HATES getting his throat swabbed. It took two nurses and myself to hold him down and it still didn’t work. Then one of the nurses–I don’t know how she did it–coaxed him into giving in and he got swabbed. Results came in: positive Strep.

He was prescribed antibiotics and Motrin for fever. No school on Monday. We had to go to McAllen to Lee’s Pharmacy because it was the only thing open that late on a Sunday. Since his insurance didn’t cover Motrin, I bought it over-the-counter. Then we headed home. I was freaking out because their very important state test, TAKS, was on Wednesday. The doctor had assured me, though, that he’d be fine by then. I could only pray.

My boss and I spent Monday and Tuesday running reports and checking to see which kids were going to qualify for the field trip to Fantasyland Skate Center that Friday.

I sent Eenan to school on Tuesday (the 4th) because he hadn’t had a fever since around 2am that morning. I get a call on my cell (while the assistant principal was in the library, thankyouverymuch! It never gets signal at any other time!) and it’s the school nurse telling me that she couldn’t give Eenan the Motrin because it didn’t have a prescription label on it. My blood starts to boil (because how dare you deny my son medication he needs when he’s got a written note from his mother granting you permission to do so!) and I calmly tell her that I followed procedure and sent a note. How did she expect it to have a label if his insurance doesn’t cover it and I got it over-the-counter. After we exchanged words for a few minutes she asks if it’s okay to give him Tylenol, because that’s the only other option. I tell her that’s fine, but Tylenol does NOT have any effect on him at all and he would be getting his fever back. She doesn’t pick up on the sarcasm and tells me that she’d be sending a note from the code of conduct book with proper procedures to follow about medication. Patronizing cow.

We were having a pep-rally for the 7th and 8th graders since they were having the TAKS test the next day. First pep-rally at our brand-new gym! As everything’s starting and we were locking up the library Estella, one of the secretaries, waves me down and starts running towards me. My heart sinks and the first thought that comes to me is “Eenan”. Sure enough, the nurse had called and couldn’t get ahold of me. I called back. She said his fever was at 102 and that he seemed really sad. I felt like laughing and screaming at her at the same time. OF COURSE, LADY! DIDN’T I TELL YOU TYLENOL WOULDN’T WORK!!! I made sure to rub it in. Idiot woman. So now she wanted me to get out of work and pick him up. If I left at that time (1:30) it was 1 1/2 hours till I got out of work but I’d end up losing a whole half-day. I made some calls and Mary said she’d pick him up. Thank God.

After I’d gotten that taken care of I called the school to ask about the TAKS. They transferred me to the test coordinator and I asked her what options we had if he was too sick to attend school on Wednesday. She told me if he went to school on Wednesday and began the test and then felt too ill to continue, he’d get all the questions he didn’t get to answer wrong and most likely he’d fail. She said our best bet would be to keep him home that day and send him to school on Thursday, because it was the make-up day and the last day they’d be able to take it. Eenan’s friend, Patrick’s, mom is the nurse assistant and I spoke to her when I called back and she gave the phone to Eenan. He’d been crying because he was so sad and scared that he’d miss the TAKS and stay in 3rd grade. Man, they really strike fear in their hearts with that darn test!

When I got home that day I told Eenan I should take him to the doctor, his actual doctor, to check on his medication and follow up because he was still getting fevers once the medicine started to wear off. He said he felt fine. I insisted, he refused. Fine.

Oh, and that letter the nurse sent with the list of “procedures”…? It stated right on the letter that over-the-counter medications that were non-prescription were to be sent with a note from the parent granting permission to administer the medicine. Mmhmm.

So now I had that weighing on my mind. And as the days seemed to stretch on with no period in sight, I started to convince myself that we’d be okay with 4 kids. That even if the whole world turned their noses up at me because I was 25 (or 26) with 4 kids I would be happy and I’d love them all the same.

Then Wednesday rolls around and THERE IT IS! I never thought I’d feel that thrilled to be on the rag. The cramps and back pain felt beautiful. I guess it was a combination of stress and my new work-out routine that caused the delay. You can bet that right after it was over I started a new pack of pills. I don’t care how fat I stay (okay, YES I DO): I don’t want to go through that ever again! I’m perfectly fine being a mother of three at the moment :).

It was TAKS day and miracle of miracles, I wasn’t a hall or bathroom monitor this time. So Mrs. V. and I caught up on some things and I worked on inventory while she ran more reports. Mary called and told me Eenan started to burn up again but she’d given him his next dose of Motrin and Tylenol. I made plans to work only a half-day so I could take him to the doctor. Now I was really nervous. Last day of TAKS was the next day and he HAD to feel better.

My boss and I had an awesome talk about UIL and other things and then I came home to pick Eenan up. I took him straight to the doctor, which took forever, but I was grateful that they saw us in the first place–we arrived 10 minutes late. The string of Strep that Eenan had was resistant to the amoxcillin the other pediatrician had prescribed. So they prescribed Zithromax, the generic brand, which tastes like earwax. We made a quick trip to Family Dollar after the pharmacy to pick up chocolate pudding to hide the Zithromax in. It worked pretty well, even though he took about half an hour to eat it.

Mario called after work that night to drop off his credit card so he could buy himself the AR-15 he wanted for our 9-year anniversary this month (the 27th). That was my gift to him.

Thankfully Eenan felt much better the next day and when I called to ask how he was doing during lunch they told me he’d finished his test way before lunchtime and he was feeling alright. I’m so glad!

I spent most of Thursday doing inventory again in my boss’s office since they were testing kids in the library and they needed silence. We were closed most of that day. When I got home I cleaned up, did everything that needed to be done and Mom, the kids and I all went to town to run errands. I needed to buy some rollerblades for our trip the next day, because I didn’t want to wear the stinky, super-sharp ones you rent from the rink. It took forever to find rollerblades without a black brake (they’re not allowed at the rink) and it took two trips to Target and one from Academy to find them (at Target). I got a few scrapbooking supplies, too (everything was on clearance!).

We gathered all the kids the next day, gave them the rules and all the teachers/sponsors took their groups (I was in charge of 7th grade, which was a small group of kids I’ve developed friendships with). It was so fun. I couldn’t wear my brand-new rollerblades because they were just too slippery. I felt like my legs were going to give out under me every time I got on the rink. So I ended up renting some anyway. I spent most of my time helping students skate. Time flew by and a few minutes before we left one of the 8th graders I’d been personally helping reach his goal started a fight. I felt so disappointed. He’d been doing so well and it took one wrong look to revert back to his old ways. He was even rude to my boss, which he’d never done before.

We got back to the school and had lunch in the cafeteria. We had a few kids that were injured so my boss was with them at the nurse’s office and I was alone in the dark library scanning the few books we had so I’d leave for Spring Break with no work to come back to. I didn’t get to do much since our internet’s still super slow. It’s like being on dial up! But I didn’t let it get to me because I was officially on vacation!

Rolando, Eenan’s best friend, spent the night. We had the whole family over and everyone chipped in time and ingredients to have shrimp cocktail since it was a Friday. I love those nights :). Eenan kept abandoning Rolando, but Jaylen would step in gladly and entertain him.

We got up the next morning, late, and made plans to go to town. We all sardined ourselves in my Equinox (Mary, Mom, all the kids and me) and we stopped by Goodwill, which was really disappointing. I hardly found anything good, but I found some brand-new Pokemon toys for the boys. Mom wanted to treat all three boys to the carnival, so there we went. I didn’t get any pictures except for my cellphone because I forgot my camera. Grr. It was the boys’ first time at the carnival after 3 years and Alaethia’s first time, ever. The boys had so much fun and so did Alaethia since she was in her beloved stroller. The boys got on a kiddie rollercoaster about 20 times, the gravatron (which made poor Rolando feel dizzy so he sat out for about 20 minutes), the house of mirrors, this other really cool walk-through thing with sliding steps and tunnels, bumper cars, air planes, my gosh–they had tons of fun. Us adults had fun watching them!

We spent a good three hours there and since it was already 4pm by the time we left and hadn’t had lunch, we stopped by Little Caesar’s to buy some pizzas. We came home, ate, the boys got on the trampoline and then Rolando went home. He’d invited Eenan to a party (with pony rides!) but we had to go to church since Mary wouldn’t be able to go the next morning due to some meetings she had to attend. So Eenan and I went that night. Mario got home and we just chilled out. We’d made plans to go practice shooting the next day at the shooting range with Jason. He called Jason to confirm plans, but Jason said he wouldn’t be able to go till 1pm. That wouldn’t do since I had Carmen’s babyshower to go to at 3 the next day and since it was in Weslaco, I’d have to be back home by at least 12 to start getting ready, stop at Target to pick up a gift card, and make it on time. He tells me that we’d go to his Grandpa’s property in Los Ebanos instead and we’d practice there. I had this weird feeling in my gut, but I swallowed it down and said okay.

Yes. Just one more day till the weekend! I really can’t wait. Alaethia refused to go to sleep till 12:30 last night, woke up for a bottle at 3am and I could barely get up at 5:20, my usual time. I let myself “sleep in” 10 more minutes, but that just made things worse since I got a headache.

Today was SO hectic at work. The kids (and some teachers) are running around like chickens with their heads cut off trying to meet the criteria to attend the field trip next Friday. (Which reminds me: I need to go and buy my own rollerblades. The ones at the skate center smell like rotten cheese.) I had kids going in all day asking me to check their goals. It’s so heartbreaking to have to turn them away because no matter how hard they try, they’re just not going to make it. I really don’t know why teachers don’t push reading until there’s a reward of some sort. Had the students been encouraged to read all year the majority would be going.

I had a little…talk with that kid that was rude to me last Wednesday. He was rude again today and I wasn’t having that crap. I don’t lose my patience very often, but this kid is just something else. Not even the rudest kids I’ve had the pleasure of encountering so far have been as rude as this one. But I think the talk might have worked, we’ll see. If there’s another little problem, I’m definitely issuing out a referral!

Things at home were much better. The boys were well behaved and Alaethia was cute, as always. She’s dancing to the little iPhone tune right now; shaking her bootie back and forth. Now she’s trying to change the channel on the TV. And is doing squats and clapping LOL.

I got to surf for a while, spoke to Sally on the phone and hung up most of the clean laundry that was laying on one of my sofas for a week. I’m terrible about putting laundry away, but I’m happy to know that my boss is also bad with it, so I’m not the only one. I made dinner (sandwiches, anyone?) and then worked out with Mary. I really don’t feel like it’s making a difference at all, but at least I’m doing something and making my heart work. I still need to work on my portion sizes and need to cut down immensely on my sweets-snacking if I want to see some kind of difference. I might go weigh myself at the nurse’s office tomorrow.

Anyway.

*sigh* I’m feeling stressed about certain things, but I won’t write about it now. Maybe I never will. I just want to document this so that I can look back and feel relieved that I made it through this and things got better.